How many people does it take
to change a low energy light bulb ?
~ None; she can cook in the dark
~ None; Real Men aren't afraid
of the dark.
~ Two; one to
do it and one to steady the chandelier.
~ None - the maid will do it.
~ None. But it takes 15 to write a paper entitled "Coping With Darkness"
~ Five; one to climb onto a chair
and reach up, four to stand around, thinking 'she'll never get that high ...'
~ Five. One to change the bulb,
and four to make T-shirts. Optional: one fraternity to start a "wet T-shirt"
~ One-two!! Check!!
One-two!! Testing, one-two!!
they don't use electricity; Girl Power - that's what they use, what they really,
~ Two; one to change
it and the other to check for bugs.
~ Four, but you have to walk them through it a few times.
~ Two; one to smash the old one, one to replace it with an identical
~ None man, we got lighters
* Students *
~ Two; one to change the bulb, one to write an essay. Oh ... and a professor
to take the credit.
one to change the bulb, while two fight about who did it last
time, one to sulk, one to prefer things as they are, and one to be totally
unaware of anything.
~ Five; one to change the bulb and four to pull
the ladder out from under him.
University of Chicago Students
~"Quiet! We're studying in the dark."
~One. But three professors and four of their pals will criticise and co-author
* * * *
~ One, but it has to look like every other light bulb on the block.
~ Two; one to screw it in and one to screw it up.
~ Fish; six to operate the red machinery, and five to turn the flamingo's
~ Two; one to stage a
suicide attack on the bulb and another to claim responsibility in phone call to
the news media.
There never was a light bulb.
~ Two; one to change it and one to give the old one a ticket for staying
on for too long.
one to hold it up while the world revolves around him.
~ One, but the bulb will have to spend four hours in the
~ None; they
don't need to, they glow in the dark.
~ Ten. One to give the bulb to the screwer-inner. One to screw in the
bulb. One to hold him on the stepladder. Four to hold the stepladder steady. One
to flick the switch to test the bulb. One to make sure that the other bulbs in
the room will need fixing. One to supervise.
~ Fifteen, because the Security Council screws up everything.
~ Fifty - One to do it and
49 to talk about it on alt.fan. low energy light bulb s or alt.change. low energy
~ Two. One
to change it and one to act as chaperone.
~ Sorry, we do not discuss
these things in front of the family
~ None. Waiters have been trained to avoid eye contact - what chance
does a burned-out bulb have?
one to tell the original joke, the rest to give some minor variation of it!
~ 472; one to write WinGet low energy light bulb
Handle, one to write WinQueryStatus low energy light bulb , one to write WinGetLightSwitchHandle
Women at a certain time of the month
8: BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THOSE WOMEN TOLD ME TO SAY. ok?
~ Two; One to change it, and one not to change it
~ Four. One to change the bulb.
Andrew Heenan's 160 Five Star Lightbulb Jokes
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There are plenty more of these jokes... please
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