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After the annual office Christmas party, Colin woke up with a pounding headache,
a mouth like the floor of the parrot's cage, and utterly unable to recall the
events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he was able
to make his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him. "Louise,"
he moaned, "Tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think it
was?" "Much, much worse," she assured him, voice dripping
with scorn, "You made a complete ass of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing
the entire senior management and insulted the Regional Director General to his
face." "Well, he's an asshole. I should have pissed on him." "You
did," Louise informed him. "And he fired you." "Well,
screw him!" sneared Colin. "I did. You're back at work on Monday." | 
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